World War I in a nutshell – Part I

So, there have been a bunch of wars between humans. I’m sure that each has a unique and amazing story behind it, and we’ll probably get to them all at some juncture. However, for the moment, I thought I’d start with the big ones, you know the ones that were so significant that they were called “WORLD” wars. And if having only one wasn’t enough, the world got together to follow up World War I with a sequel a few years later and then spent the better part of the next 4 decades living in fear of part III.

World War I

World War I, also known as “The Great War”, took place mostly in Europe between 1914 and 1918. World War I is also sometimes called, “The War to End All Wars” which makes no sense because it did no such thing. Sort of like the Civil War being called “Civil.” Anyway, there were about 20 million soldiers and civilians killed in World War I and another 20 million injured in some way. 20 million. Times two. For some perspective, you could fill Yankee stadium to capacity every home game for 8 and a half years and not get to 40 million people.

The war was mostly battled between Germany and Hungary against Britain, Italy, and France. The Russians were involved (fighting against the German side) ’til their revolution in 1917. The United States got involved for the last year of the conflict. World War I was the first war where planes participated in the destruction. Of significant note, World War I essentially destroyed the world order that had existed for about 100 years. The Russian empire? Niet. Ottoman? Gone. German? B’bye. After things were said and done, about half a dozen countries (including Finland, Latvia, Poland, Czechoslovakia, and Lithuania) had their independence.

So how did this awesome display of humans destroying everything around them begin? The prevailing theory is that a single shot from a single assassin left a power-vacuum in a really appealing place, thus bringing a bunch of greedy despots to a dinner table where there was a big steak on the table but only silverware for one person. The truth is actually a bit more complicated then that: on June 28, 1914, a young Bosnian-Serb named Gavrilo Princip shot and killed the Archduke Franz Ferdinand, heir to the Austro-Hungarian throne. Austria-Hungry, justifiably pissed off, demanded that the Serbs take action against the radical group to which Princip claimed affiliation or allow them (the Austro-Hungarians) to come in to Serbia to investigate. The Serbs did nothing so Austria-Hungary declared war on them. Here’s where things get tricky: through decades and decades of agreements between countries to protect each other’s interests and defend each other in the event of a war, a lot of favors were called in by the Serbs and Austro-Hungarians seemingly overnight. Give it a couple of weeks, and a continent and a half are officially at war.

Here’s the rub: Ferdinand should have never been killed that day. Princip’s group had 7 assassins lined up along the route the Arch-duke would be driving. Each was supposed to try and kill him. The first guy choked and did nothing. The second guy hurled a grenade that missed the Arch-Duke’s car and hit another in his convoy, injuring two people. The Arch-Duke and his crew sped away safely. Later that day, they decided to go visit the folks injured by the bomb at the hospital but his driver took a wrong turn. When the driver realized the error of his directions, he tried to turn the car around but it stalled…in front of a sandwich shop where Princip happened to be eating lunch. When the car stopped, Princip stepped out in the street with a pistol and from about 5 feet away at 11am, set off a chain of events that led to World War I.

And since things are never simple in international politics, it’s only fair to point out that a wide range of other factors contributed to the extraordinarily fast pace that things went from docile to devastating. The German’s and English had been in an arms race of their own over the ocean… the German mobilization plan caused them to move quickly to avoid fighting a war on two fronts… the Russians seem to think that economic imperialism from the West is in part to blame… the United States held in part that trade barriers caused the war…and most all of Europe is in agreement that everyone was so concerned about maintaining a balance of power among all nations that the moment the balance was upset a little, everyone went bonkers to protect their own self-interest with the belief that the balance could not be restored. It’s possible, even probable, that Europe was a powder keg waiting to blow in the 1910’s. That said, for some reason, it didn’t catch fire until Arch-Duke Ferdinand’s driver stalled his convertible in front of a sandwich shop.

So, once things got going, what happened? Strangely, much of the first fighting happened in Africa between the British, French, and Germany. A week or so later, the Serbs started fighting the Austrians that had crossed their border. A week after that, the Germans and Russians got in to it. While that was going on, the Germans didn’t have the resources to fight the English and French to the west, which ensured that the conflict would not be a short one. Not to be outdone, the Australians and Japanese were picking off islands under German control in the South Pacific. Soonafter, Allied forces had taken over all the islands Germany had in the area.

World War I was the first war to use some really nasty advances in war technology. For example, large infantry units had hell moving around due to barbed wire being strung across the European continent. They also had difficulty moving across open land due to the introduction of the machine gun. And, just in case they made it close enough to the enemy to consider how they would fight them, the soldiers got to breath poisonous gas thrown at them by their adversaries. And if that weren’t enough, big hulking masses of steel called “tanks” were now available. Ah, the joy of technology!

For the next 2 years, no one made much progress in “winning” anything. Mostly, the war was a contest to see who could kill or maim the most people on the other side. The participants also succeeded in digging trenches and foxholes all over Europe to serve as protection and shelter. To get an idea of how many miles of trenches were dug, get in your car and drive from New York City to Los Angeles and then back to New York….and you’d still be about 300 miles short.

Tomorrow: Part II of World War I.

Republicans and Democrats, oh my!

After last night’s uber-boring compliment fest between Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama, I thought it appropriate to discuss the history of the Republican Party and the Democratic Party in this country….

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America’s Two Party System in a Nutshell

America’s political system is essentially made up of Republicans and Democrats. Once upon a time, it was Federalists vs. Democrats, then Whigs vs. Dems, and a couple of other iterations to get where we are today. But for the most part, this country has always been a two party system. Currently, about a third of voters don’t identify with either party, but the parties exist nonetheless. Democrats claim to have more registered members then Republicans at present, but the advantage isn’t all that large.

Being a political candidate in a party brings a number of advantages that wouldn’t be present if you simply ran on your own, independent of party affiliation. Most importantly, being in a party brings money, organization, and the benefit of picking up votes from people who don’t know who you are but choose to vote “straight ticket” on their ballot wherein they cast one vote that says, “I am voting for all the people in this party.” For example, Rick Perry (Governor of Texas) managed to ride the coattails of George W. Bush (who was insanely popular in Texas) in to public office because he ran as a Republican with Bush on the ballot. A few million “straight ticket” votes later, he was Lt. Governor. Now, he’s parlayed that into being the Governor despite the fact he has no business running a roadside lemonade stand, much less being the chief executive of a wonderful state. Sigh.

Anyway, as mentioned before, the two parties that shove everyone around like bullies on the playground are the Republicans and Democrats. Yes, there are other parties like the Reform Party and the Libertarians, but despite a great deal of effort and enthusiasm by supporters, these parties are more pot-stirrers in the dialog rather then winners at the polls.

The Republican Party was founded in 1854 and is often referred to as the “Grand Old Party” or “GOP.” As an aside, this makes no sense as the Democratic party is actually older then the GOP. The Republicans came to prominence when a strapping young lad named Abe Lincoln won the Presidency in 1860. The Presidency has been held by Republicans 18 times, most recently by George W. Bush. To hear historians tell it, the Republican party stands for fiscal conservatism, smaller government, lower taxes, personal responsibility, states’ rights, and strong foreign policy. The Republican party held the White House during the Civil War, Reconstruction, the beginning of the Great Depression, the fall of the Soviet Union, 9/11, and Hurricane Katrina. The buzzword of the present day to describe the Republican Party is “conservative” although the meaning years ago (smaller government, less spending, lower taxes) has morphed in to something different (social conservatism, a la opposing gay marriage, regulating media content, putting religion in to schools, etc.).

The Democratic party has it’s roots in the Democratic-Republican party founded by Thomas Jefferson and James Madison in 1792 to piss off Alexander Hamilton, who was trying to ramrod Federalist fiscal policies down the throat of our young country. The party first won the Presidency in 1800 (Pres #3, Jefferson). It has technically been in it’s current incarnation since 1912 when the Democrats first made it a point to position its policies and platform to the left of the Republican party. When Franklin Roosevelt won election in 1932, he managed to solidify the Democratic party’s agenda going forward as absolutely, positively, unapologetically liberal. The Democratic party held the White House during both World Wars, the New Deal, and the Civil Rights movement. The Democratic platform usualy advocates “populism” which is code for taxation, government administered programs like Social Security and Welfare, more government involvement in people’s lives, and social liberalism. Traditionally, Democrats have been pro-Choice, anti-death penalty, unopposed to same sex Marriages, and in favor of maintaining the separation of church and state.

Fun Fact #1 that may help you when a free beer at the bar: William Jennings Bryan, 3 time Presidential loser, pastor, staunch prohibitionist, and lawyer against evolution in the Scopes trial (as portrayed in the book Inherit the Wind) was a Democrat, not a Republican. (Drink up!)

Fun Fact #2 – The unoffical mascot of the Democratic Party is the donkey. There are many theories as to why, but one prevailing theory is that when Andrew Jackson was running for President in 1828, his opponents called him a “jackass” so much that the imagery attached itself to his party and stuck.

So, in summary…

Republicans: AKA the “GOP”, came to prominence with the election of Lincoln, “conservative” policies that supposedly advocate less government, lower taxation, states’ rights, socially restrictive policies, aggressive foreign policy, and a big elephant logo. Famous Republicans include Ronald Reagan, Abe Lincoln, Richard Nixon, and Chuck Norris.

Democrats: Nearly as old as this country itself, solidified it’s current bent with the election of FDR, “liberal” policies that include having the government decide what to do with more of your money through taxation, funding and management of social programs aimed to help the less-fortunate among us, social policy that advocates the idea that people should be free to choose what to do with themselves and to themselves. Somewhere along the way, someone brought a donkey to the party and left it. Famous Democrats include FDR, JFK, and Barbara Streisand.

GOP Logo:

Dem logo:

The Difference Between Monet and Manet

This topic was suggested by Kevin Leneway when he came with the idea for a site like BitLesson, so I thought it only fair to start with it. Let’s get going…

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Monet vs. Manet

Claude Monet and Edourad Manet (pronounced like Edward without the “d” at the end) were French impressionist painters in the 19th century. Monet painted a ton of landscapes and scenes while Manet did a lot of work with people as the main subjects. The whole French Impressionist movement is named after a painting by Monet called “Impression, Sunrise.” Most of the paintings in the movement have lots of brush strokes, gobs of paint, and not much worrying about lines in favor of utilizing lots of light and color.

Monet didn’t rip off other artists as many of his contemporaries did, preferring to paint what he saw with his own two eyes. He spent a couple years in Algeria fighting as part of the Calvary before his aunt sprung him from service. Upon returning home, Monet painted his future-wife along with outdoor scenes and started garnering some acclaim. Problem is, acclaim and 50 cents will get you a cup of coffee on the corner, so Monet jumped in to the Seine river in 1868 to try and kill himself because he was broke and couldn’t support his girlfriend and their new baby. Eventually, he swam to shore, toweled off, and got back to painting. He traveled to England and Amsterdam a bit, got married, had another kid, and settled in Giverny. After a few years, Monet was banking enough cash to buy his own house and some land. He married again after his first wife died and traveled some more around Europe. Monet lived a long happy life painting landscapes and water lilies on a farm surrounded by his loving family and big potato sacks full of cash* before dying of lung cancer at age 86. In 2004, one of his painting sold for 20 million smackers.

*(He probably didn’t have big sacks of cash, but he did have some money finally and didn’t die a pauper like lots of artists.)

On the other hand, Manet used a lot more lines in his paintings then other Impressionist painters and preferred painting in a studio to being outdoors. He was born in to money and used it to set up his own exhibits when more traditional studios and exhibitors rejected his works. At the same time, he worked to get his paintings in to the Paris Salon, which was kind of a big deal. His painting “Olympia” got everyone all up in a tizzy because the main subject is presumably a courtesan, which is a fancy way of saying “high class hooker”. She’s laying on a bed nude with lots of “come hither” accents (orchid in the hair, bouquet of flowers, black cat on the bed). I was under the impression that Paris in 1863 was probably a pretty sexually liberated place, but whatever. Manet also painted war scenes which made the government angry. In fact, he has a slew of paintings that he was not permitted to display because they didn’t paint the French military and government in a great light. Manet married a piano teacher, which is rather uninteresting until you consider she was also sleeping with his Dad. They didn’t get married til Manet’s Dad passed away and their 11 year old son could have easily been either Manet or his Dad’s child. That said, it probably doesn’t matter in hindsight because the kid’s surname was going to be “Manet” either way. Manet had a much more colorful demise than Monet as he suffered through syphilis, rheumatism, and ganggrene before passing away at the age of 51. One of his paintings also fetched 20 million dollars in 2000, which no doubt pleased his great-grandchildren.

So…

Monet: outdoor scenes, tried to kill himself, married twice, two kids from the first woman, retired to Giverny and finally made some loot in his later days.

Manet: indoor scenes and people, war scenes, shared a girlfriend with his dad, died of some nasty stuff at a relatively early age.

Monet’s “Impression, Sunrise”

Manet’s “Olympia”